wie bei der vorigen Geschichte (hier im Thread) ist auch diese ein Fundstück aus grauer Vorzeit. Ebenefalls nicht von mir, über den Autor ist mir leider nichts weiter bekannt. Die Story ist aber sehr anregend! Viel Spaß.
Niki
About ten years ago, I was living with my girlfriend Ginger in a very nice house
located in a middle class neighborhood. We both had professional jobs - I would
travel occasionally, but the majority of the time I was home. The neighborhood
we lived in was inhabited with couples roughly our age, but most of them had
kids and we did not. Nothing much ever happened in this peaceful Midwestern town
and nobody even locked their doors. That's how this whole thing started.
One afternoon I left work a couple of hours early and went home to cut the
grass. When I arrived, I noticed a neighbor girl's bicycle in our front yard but
I didn't think much of it. It belonged to Niki, a budding young 14 year old girl
who lived across the street. Her parents were both at work and Niki was home
from school. I walked into the house and headed for our bedroom to change my
clothes. When I got to the bedroom door I had the shock of my life. There was
Niki, going through Ginger's underwear drawer. She would pull out a pair of
Ginger's panties and hold them to her nose while inhaling deeply. I had never
known a girl who was interested in other girls so I decided to be quiet and she
what she would do next. After checking out almost every pair of panties, Niki
headed for the clothes hamper. She opened it up and dug around, finally
extracting a pair of Ginger's worn panties - the pair that she had on yesterday
while working out at the club. I knew that these panties had to be very soiled!
Niki held them up to her nose and inhaled again. This time she let out a soft
moan. Still not noticing me behind the door, Niki put out her tongue and licked
the smelly cotton crotch. As she did this her other had reached down and started
to rub her own crotch through her cutoffs. It was about this time that I decided
it was time to make my appearance.
"Niki!" I barked. "What the hell are you doing?"
She quickly tried to hide the panties that were hanging out of her mouth and
muttered "What are you doing home? You're supposed to be at work!"
"That's not the question at hand," I said. She started to cry and now I felt
like a big jerk. I tried to console her. "Don't worry. I'm not mad - just
surprised. I've never seen anything like this. How come you're doing this,
anyway?"
"Well", she sobbed, "I've never been too interested in boys and I always get
funny feelings when I'm in the shower at school with a bunch of naked girls.
They smell so good when they get all sweaty. A couple of months ago I talked to
Ginger when she came home from the gym, all sweaty and wearing those tight
leotards. She invited me in and we talked while she got undressed. She smelled
so good that I started to tingle all over and my own panties started to get wet.
When she got into the shower I picked up her bikini panties and opened the
crotch up. It was soaked with sweat and a thick white juice that I had never
seen before. It was then that I tasted pussy for the first time! It was
delicious. Kind of tangy - kind of sweet. I even licked the small light brown
area that was from her lovely butt. It tasted even better! Ever since that day I
would come over when nobody was here just to suck on Ginger's dirty panties."
By this time I was so confused I didn't know what to do. Here before me was a
lovely young girl that just adored the taste of my girlfriend's pussy and
asshole. I didn't want to break her heart - and I also figured to get something
out of this. "Well, don't worry. I won't tell anyone," I said. And you can come
over anytime that Ginger is gone and use her panties."
Her eyes lit up and she said, "Really! I can come over any time? That's great!"
Then she asked, "Have you ever licked a pair of dirty panties? They taste great.
Do you want to suck on mine? They are really wet right now. Plus, I've been
riding my bike all day and the seat pushes them right up my butt."
I found myself speechless. Niki went into the bathroom and emerged a couple of
minutes later holding her panties in her hand. "Here", she said. "Taste these.
These are as fresh as they can be. They're still warm."
I took them and held them up to my face. She was right. They were warm and very
wet - and sticky. I stuck my tongue out and ran it down the length of the crotch
area. It DID taste good! I sucked the whole crotch into my mouth and sucked
until the flavor was almost gone. I then handed them back to her.
"Aren't you going to suck on the brown streak? That's the best part!"
I looked at them again and sure enough, there was a small streak of brown,
obviously where her asshole had been resting. I picked them up and flicked my
tongue against the spot. "Not bad", I said. "This does taste good". I looked at
the clock at it was almost 5:00. I told Niki that she better go home before
Ginger got home. She went into the bathroom to put her panties back on and when
she came out I noticed a large wet spot where her pussy bulge was. "You better
not let your folks see that wet spot!" I said. She said that she could get to
her bedroom before her parents would see her. Then she walked out the door.
Shortly after Niki left I heard Ginger pull into the driveway. We had a quiet
evening at home and went to bed early. While we were getting ready for bed
Ginger asked me if I had been in her drawers. I denied it, of course. "Well,
someone's been through my underwear drawer! It doesn't look like anything is
missing but we had better call the police!" I told her not to worry but she
insisted that I call the cops. So I sat her down and told her what had happened
this afternoon. Surprisingly, she was not angry. In fact while I was telling her
how much Niki loved the taste of her pussy she kind of rubbed her legs together
and her eyes got glazed. My girlfriend was getting turned on hearing how Niki
loved to suck the dried pussy juice from her panties. Before long she was all
over me like a bitch in heat. She sucked and fucked my brains out!
The next morning I woke up first and decided to beat Ginger to the shower. While
standing under the soothing hot water I was thinking about what happened the day
before. It was obvious that Ginger was really turned on knowing that the 14 year
old girl across the street had the hots for her. "Maybe we can take this a
little further", I mumbled to myself. When I walked out of the bathroom there
was Ginger lying on the bed, legs spread with her panties still on, rubbing her
crotch from clit to asshole. She stopped long enough to push the material up
inside her pussy, soaking up all the juices she could. Then she reached under
her cheeks and pushed her panties into her open asshole with her middle finger.
While her finger was up her butt, she rolled it from side to side, trying to get
as much of her panties inside as possible. "What are you doing now?", I asked.
"I'm going to give Niki a pair of my panties that she won't forget!" she
responded.
"This pair of full of your cum, my cum, and now I'm getting them smeared with my
shit! After that I going to pee in them. She's gonna love the taste of these!"
When Ginger got up she went into the bathroom and squatted down on the toilet.
She spread her cunt lips wide while still wearing the panties and started to
piss right through them. When she finished she slid them down her legs and
walked over to the clothes hamper. "I'll lay these right on top where Niki can
find them. Tonight we should be able to tell if she was here". When she returned
to the bathroom, I went to the hamper and inspected her work. Her panties were
full of all kinds of goodies. There was our cum caked on the crotch panel. Down
from that was a good size streak of Ginger's own feces, and the whole thing was
wet with pee. "Yep, she will like these". Just then I remembered the video tape
that I had made of Ginger one night while she was especially hot. The entire
scene was with Ginger masturbating with fruits and vegetables and a couple of
household utensils. I removed the tape from its hiding place and set it next to
the panties in the hamper. I figured that Niki would get a real kick out of
watching Ginger while sucking on her panties. Then we left for work.
All day long all I could think of was Niki at my house watching the video of my
wife masturbating while sucking on her panties. It drove me crazy. I couldn't
wait to get home to check to hamper. When I finally did get home I rushed into
the bedroom and opened the hamper and sure enough, Niki had been there. The
video tape was not exactly where I had left it and there were some stick remains
left on it. Then I checked the panties and they were almost as clean as if they
had been washed. About that time Ginger walked into the room and saw the video
tape. She must have recognized which one it was because she spoke out, "You left
my dildo tape for her to watch?" She sounded mad but then she asked, "Did she
watch it? Do you think she liked it?" I then looked over on the bed and saw a
large stain on the middle of the bedspread. "I think she did. She must have cum
several times in order to leave a spot that big". When I said that Ginger's eyes
glazed over again and she started to squirm. I knew that I would get another
great fucking tonight. Sure enough, after supper she attacked my on the couch
and smothered my face with her delicious cunt. I licked her for a while and then
flipped her off and gave her the fucking of her life. The whole time, though,
she seemed preoccupied. After I came and we both got cleaned up, I asked her if
something was wrong. "No", she said. "Nothing is wrong". But the rest of the
night she never said a word - nor did she even hear me when I spoke. I finally
got her attention and said, "Don't tell me nothing's wrong. Are you mad because
I let Niki watch your dildo tape?" "On the contrary, all I can think about is
that young girl lying on our bed watching me fuck myself with my panties stuck
in her mouth. Thinking about it really turns me on." "Well, what should we do
about it?", I asked. She was silent for a moment and then she said, "Lets call
in sick tomorrow and hide in the closet and wait for Niki to come over. I want
to see her diddle herself." "Would you like her to lick your pussy?" I asked.
"Yes and my asshole too!" She said. "I'd like to suck on her young cunt too.
Lets video tape her tomorrow".
The next morning we got up early in preparation for our young visitor. Ginger
said that she was going to prepare a special pair of panties for Niki. She
climbed on the bed and got on all fours. "Come get a close view of my butt", she
said. "These are going to be extra special". I moved in behind her to get a good
view. With that she pulled her panties up into her butt as far as they would go.
Then she started to push and push. She was going to shit into her panties! What
a great idea. Then suddenly I could see a slight bulge directly over her asshole
as a turd started to slide out. Ginger pinched it off when it was about 3 inches
long. "That's enough for the little tart", she exclaimed." I don't want to use
it all up". "What are you saving it for?", I asked. "That's my little secret",
she responded. Ginger carefully removed her panties, trying not to let her feces
fall out and she placed them in the usual spot. After we both showered we set up
the video camera in the closet so we could tape Niki.
At 7:30 we both got in the car and drove around the block and parked the car. We
snuck back to the house and entered through the back door. We both entered the
closet in our bedroom and waited patiently, leaving the door ajar so we had a
good view of the bed. After about 10 minutes, we heard the front door open. The
footsteps were getting louder and louder. I started the video camera and waited
for her to enter the room. Then there she was, our little neighbor girl, once
again going through the clothes hamper. When she found the treat that Ginger
left her, she removed her shorts and panties in one motion. To our surprise, she
threw her clothes toward the closet door, landing close enough for me to grab.
As soon as I had her panties, Ginger grabbed them from me and held them to her
nose. After inhaling deeply she opened her mouth and inserted the crotch panel.
She licked and sucked them until all signs of Niki were gone. Niki was busy
scraping out the surprise that Ginger had left her with her fingers. When she
had a sizeable amount on her fingers she brought them to her mouth and sucked
Ginger's shit off! This nearly drove Ginger crazy watching this girl actually
eat her shit! Then to our surprise she reached under her own butt in stuck a
finger up her own ass. She rammed it in and out, the whole time moaning and
groaning. Then she removed the finger that was buried in her asshole. We could
both see that it was covered with shit. And just like the other fingers, she
brought this one to her mouth and licked her own shit off! I think Ginger had an
orgasm at the same time! Ginger whispered to me "I have to get out there and
suck on her pussy! My cunt is dripping wet. I want to taste her asshole!"
"No we don't want to scare her off now. We'll let her watch this videotape of
herself tomorrow. Then I think she will be ready for you!" We watched for
another half hour and then Niki left. Later that day Ginger begged me to go to
an adult book store and get her a couple of dildos. She wanted a double sided
one for her to fuck Niki with and a smaller on to ream her asshole with.
Reluctantly I agreed to go. When I returned home Ginger couldn't wait to try
them out. She ripped open the packages and smeared K-Y over the smaller of the
2. Then she shoved it all the way up her asshole with one motion. She fucked
herself until she had a huge orgasm. She thrashed around while saying, "Niki,
fuck my ass faster-faster".
That night I knew that I had to come up with a way to get Niki and Ginger
together. I thought about surprising Niki from the closet but it might scare her
off. So I decided to use the direct approach. The next day was Saturday and
Ginger would we doing her weekly shopping and this usually took her all day. I
made up my mind to have Niki come over so I could ask her to make it with my
girlfriend.
The next morning Ginger left to shop at 9:00 and I was on the phone at 9:01. I
invited Niki over for a little talk. She seemed uneasy but I was sure she had
know idea what the discussion would be. A couple of minutes later she knocked on
the front door and let herself in. She was wearing a halter top and a pair of
tight satin shorts. The shorts were riding up her crotch - splitting her pussy
right down the middle. Boy did she look good. It was no wonder that Ginger
wanted to make it with her. "I hope you've enjoyed the panties that Ginger has
been leaving you", I said. "They were great! And the video you left for me was a
real nice touch. Ginger sure is beautiful". "I thought you might like the video.
The night I taped that Ginger was feeling extra naughty. She really got off
making it. I have another video that I'd like to show you now. I think you will
find this one just as good". I reached up and started the tape that we made of
Niki last night. I wanted to see what her reaction would be, knowing that
someone was watching her while she sucked on Ginger's panties. As soon as it
started she realized what it was and she blushed heavily. Then she noticed that
both of my arms were in the picture. "Who was holding the camera? Was it
Ginger?"
"Yes, we were both hiding in the closet watching you. And when you tossed your
panties over by the closet, I picked them up and Ginger grabbed them from me and
started to suck on them. She got very excited watching you and tasting your
pussy juice. Later that night she said that she wanted to suck you cunt and have
you suck hers." Her eyes almost jumped out of their sockets. "She wants to suck
my pussy? I've been dying to get my tongue up her butt ever since I tasted a
pair of panties. I thought that it was weird at first but then I read where a
lot of women like to make it with other women. Can we get together tonight?"
"I'm sure that Ginger would love to. I talk to her when she gets home." Then
Niki got all excited. "Look at my shorts. The crotch is soaking wet already. I
don't think I can wait that long!"
"Well, I could probably clean up that sticky mess in your shorts".
"Would you? You never really seemed interested in me. What would Ginger say if
she knew we had sex?"
"Hell, she's going to have her tongue up you asshole later tonight so can she
blame me for the same thing?" With that we both got undressed and immediately
put together a sixty nine. She had the best tasting pussy I've ever licked. And
the wettest. She constantly flooded my mouth with a think white cream. After
about 10 minutes I could feel my cum boiling in my balls and before I could warn
her I shot a load right down her throat. When she felt it hit the back of her
throat she sucked even harder. "This kid is great", I thought. But I didn't want
to fuck her until tonight so we quit and I sent her back home. Now it was time
to prepare for the night of our lives.
Ginger walker in the door, returning from her shopping around 3:00. I told her
that I had good news. "What is it", she quickly responded. "I got a date for you
with Niki", I replied. "How did you do it without scaring her off?" she asked.
"Well I showed her the video we made of her and she noticed that you must have
been holding the camera. She really got excited when I told her that you loved
the taste of her panties and you wanted to stick your tongue up her little
asshole", I said.
"You told her that? She's going to think that I'm a pervert!" she responded.
"What did you expect", I said, "Leaving your shit stained panties for to her
suck on right on top of the dirty laundry. And what about your videotape we let
her watch. You shoved everything you could get your hands on up both your
holes".
"Well, if she's coming over tonight I'm going to have to get ready", she said.
And with that she hurried off into the bedroom and locked the door. I could hear
the shower running but I had no idea what she was doing the rest of the two
hours she was locked in there. I decided that I probably needed to take a nap so
I was well rested for tonight's activity.
A couple hours later I woke up at just the time Ginger was unlocking the bedroom
door. She gave me a spin and asked, "Well, how do I look?"
"You look like you're only 14 years old", I responded. The 2 hours that Ginger
spent locked in the bedroom was used to transform herself from a 27 year old
woman into a 14 year old girl. She had her hair in pigtails and was wearing a
pair of very skimpy shorts. They only covered about half of her butt. Then she
laid back on the bed and spread her legs, holding the crotch of her shorts to
one side. "Look", she said, "No more hair!"
Sure enough, she had shaved her entire crotch area from the top of her pussy
down to her asshole. "Come get a closer look", she said.
I put my head down to her crotch and inspected it very closely - and she was
right - there was not a hair to be found. Her pussy lips were sticking out from
her vulva about half an inch. I never realized that she had such large lips
before. I guess the hair covered them up. When I looked closely at her budding
asshole I swear it winked at me! "You look fabulous", I stated. I can't wait for
the activity to start.
"You have to get ready too", she said. "Now go take a quick shower and call me
when your are finished". I jumped in the shower and scrubbed myself until I was
squeaky clean. When I stepped out, Ginger was sitting on the toilet with a razor
and a can of shave cream. "We have to get you looking like a little boy so lay
down on the bed and I will shave your crotch."
What could I say at this point? I wanted everything to be perfect. I did what I
was told and Ginger lathered my entire crotch - from my belly button down to my
asshole. Then she came at me with that razor. "Don't be nervous. I won't cut
you", she said. "I just shaved myself and didn't get one nick."
I gave in and she completely shaved me. I felt kind of strange. It was like I
was standing in a draft - everything was so cool. "Now go get dressed and meet
me in the living room."
Once again I did what I was told and ending up in the living room. Seven o'clock
finally arrived and the doorbell rang. Ginger answered it and in popped Niki.
She was dressed in a short tight skirt with a small tube top. She looked
stunning. "I'm glad you could come", said Ginger.
"I wouldn't miss this for the anything", responded Niki. "I've been so excited
about this all day long. My pussy has been soaked since I got up this morning.
That's why I wore a skirt. I couldn't keep from soaking my shorts. I went
through 3 pair today and creamed each one".
Ginger put her arms around Niki and gave her a long hard kiss. I could see each
of their mouths open as their tongues sought out each other. When they parted
Niki came over to me and kissed me the same way. "Let's make Ginger jealous",
Niki said.
"I won't get jealous", Ginger replied, "I'm going to be to busy tonguing your
body to be jealous." After saying that, Ginger got down on her knees and lifted
Niki's skirt. "Look at this pussy! Doesn't look delicious?" Then she parted the
lips and pushed her tongue inside. Niki started to squeal and I recommended that
we go over to the bed. After climbing on the bed, Ginger was on her back with
Niki straddling her face. I could see Ginger's tongue working over the young
girl's pussy and Niki was rewarding her with gobs of her white sticky cream.
"This cunt is delicious", Ginger mumbled. "If I'd known this before I would have
had a ball at college eating pussy!" Looking at Niki I realized that she had
nothing to suck on so I quickly climbed up and offered her my cock. She grabbed
it and put her mouth over it and sucked like a pro.
What a sight! My girlfriend with a mouth full of 14 year old pussy and a 14 year
old with a mouth full of my cock! "Wait a minute! I have to set up the video
camera", a blurted. I pulled my cock from Niki's mouth and scurried over to the
closet. I quickly set up the camera on a tripod and resumed my position. Niki
was sucking like a pro - taking my entire cock into her mouth and throat. I felt
like I was about to cum so I pulled out. After all, I wanted this night to last
longer than 5 minutes! I decided to let the girls have some fun on their own so
I took the camera off the tripod and prepared for some custom work. I told
Ginger to get on all fours and Niki to get behind her. "Now ask Ginger if you
can lick her ass", I said.
And with that innocent face Niki asked, "Ginger, can I please lick your
beautiful asshole, please?"
"Of course you can", replied Ginger. "And I have a big surprise for you. I've
been saving it all day just for you."
"What is it?" Niki asked.
"You'll find out soon enough". With that Niki buried her face in Ginger's butt
and snaked her tongue all around Ginger's protruding asshole. Ginger was in
heaven. "Stick you tongue up my butt, you slut", demanded Ginger. "I want you to
taste the inside of my ass - taste my fresh shit!"
"Oh yes, I love the taste of your shit! Give it to me", Niki begged.
As I closely watched, I could see Ginger's asshole open up like a rosebud in
bloom. "Here comes your surprise", she groaned. I could now see her brown hole
open up more and the signs of a fresh turd appeared. As soon as the tip
appeared, Niki clamped her mouth over it and tried to suck it out. Ginger could
obviously feel this so she pushed a little more, causing the turd to stick out
more.
"Ah", Niki moaned. "I almost have it. Give me some more." Hearing that, Ginger
pushed with full force and her shit started to slide out. Three inches. Then six
inches. And finally nine inches of shit was hanging out of her asshole. Niki had
as much of it in her mouth as she could but there was still four inches of
Ginger's turd that wouldn't fit. Then, to my total surprise, Ginger swung around
and clamped her mouth over the excess turd! I almost shit myself! Ginger was
sucking on her own turd! I zoomed the camera in on this action so I could get
the expression on her face. She was really enjoying it. Ginger loved the taste
of her own shit. Now Ginger took a couple inches of her turd and offered it to
me. "What the hell", I said. "Let's give it a taste". I grabbed it and held it
up to my mouth. I smelled like shit alright, but I thought that if they can eat
it so can I. So I opened my mouth and shoved it in. It tasted kind of bitter,
but it wasn't bad. I wouldn't make a steady diet of it but it seemed appropriate
tonight.
After we all finished our brown meal, Ginger asked, "Who is thirsty? I have a
lot of hot piss to wash down Niki's shit."
It was like asking a bum if he wants a drink. We both laid on the bed, opened
our mouths while Ginger stood over us. She let out a large stream of scalding
piss and aimed it into my mouth first and then Niki. We both drank until the
well ran dry. "Well Niki," asked Ginger," Do you have something for me?"
"I sure do," she replied. Niki stood up on the bed and bent over while spreading
her young butt. Her asshole looked so pink and small - not stained like
Ginger's. Looking at the expression on her face I could tell that she was
pushing as hard as she could.
"Relax", Ginger said. "Don't push too hard. It will come out when it's ready".
Ginger moved in very close to get a good view of the young girl's butt. All of a
sudden a fart escaped from Niki's ass. "Oops", Niki giggled. "Sorry about that".
But Ginger didn't mind at all. She had her face buried in Niki's butt and was
inhaling deeply. "It smelled delicious", moaned Ginger. After a couple of
minutes of Niki trying to shit, Ginger licked her finger and pushed it deeply
into Niki's butt. "I'll give you a hand - or a finger", Ginger said. "It always
works for me when I can't go". She started to wiggle her finger around deep
inside Niki's butt.
"OOOh", Squealed Niki, "That feels good! Push it in deeper". Ginger pushed her
finger in as far as it would go. "I think I feel something, let's check". Ginger
slowly removed her finger from its hideaway and looked at it closely. "Nothing
yet. But by the smell on my finger you must be close". Ginger reinserted her
finger in Niki's butt. She worked it in and out as fast as she could. Niki was
moving her butt to match Ginger's finger.
All of a sudden Ginger blurted out, "I think it's coming! I feel something!"
Then she removed her finger once again from Niki's butt and held it up. "Look!
It's coming," Ginger squealed. Then she put her finger in her mouth and licked
it clean before replacing it back in Niki's butt. This time Ginger thrust her
finger furiously in and out of Niki's butt.
"Here it comes!" squealed Niki. Ginger pulled her finger out and placed her
mouth directly over the young girl's virgin asshole. Just then I saw Ginger's
cheeks start to bulge and I knew she was receiving her reward. When she couldn't
hold anymore, Ginger pulled away and said, "It's your turn, Tom, she has more.
Put your mouth over her asshole and open wide."
She didn't have to tell me twice! By the time I got into position, Niki had a 4
inch piece of shit hanging out of her asshole. I put my mouth over it and waited
for some more before I pinched it off with my teeth. I looked at Ginger and she
was busy chewing and swallowing the treat that Niki gave us.
It didn't taste as bitter as Ginger's but it sure made us thirsty. "How about
some of you pee?" asked Ginger. "We are sure thirsty."
"Sure", Niki squealed. "I need to piss real bad."
This time Ginger put her mouth directly over Niki's little pussy and Niki pissed
directly into it.
"Save some for me", I exclaimed. Ginger pulled away and I got into position. I
opened my mouth and waiting for Niki to continue pissing. Suddenly a warm flow
of her golden nectar was filling my mouth. I swallowed as fast as I could but
some leaked out. It also tasted different from Ginger's piss. Not quite as salty
- more on the sweet side. Niki stopped and asked for a glass. Ginger reached
over on the nightstand and grabbed a glass. Niki held in between her legs and
starting peeing again. She got the glass about half full when she ran dry. Then
she held the glass to her lips and drank it down without stopping. "This tastes
good", she said while licking her lips. After we were done eating and drinking I
asked Niki if she has ever been fucked. "Yes, but never in my butt! Would you
like to?"
She didn't have to ask me twice. I found some k-y and smeared all over my cock
and into her dirty asshole. Her shitter felt tight around my finger. I knew this
was going to be the snugest fuck I'd ever had. She got her hands and knees and
reached back and spread her ass. I got behind Niki and guided my cock to the
small opening she presented me. As I eased my rod into her hole I could feel her
sphincter spasm. After a few short strokes I got the entire length in. As I
worked in and out, I could see her shit all over my tool. It made a different
kind of friction. It felt strange. As I was ready to cum Ginger pulled me off
and put the entire length of my cock into her mouth! It had to be going down her
throat. She sucked until I exploded. She greedily swallowed my cum and Niki's
shit.
By this time we were all pretty tired so Niki got cleaned up and left. We both
dozed off still covered with shit and piss. I had the craziest dream but I'll save that for another story.